Powerful Books On Emotional Abuse By Parents

Allison has run away from home because of her emotionally and physically abusive father. Her father’s girlfriend left as well, and this triggered her father’s mood to different heights. With nowhere to live, finds herself hiding out in the shed of what she thinks is an abandoned house. But the house isn’t empty. An elderly woman named Marla, with dementia, lives there – and she mistakes Allison for an old friend from her past called Toffee. Allison is used to hiding who she really is, and trying to be what other people want her to be. And so, Toffee is who she becomes. After all, it means she has a place to stay. There are worse places she could be. But as their bond grows, and Allison discovers how much Marla needs a real friend, she begins to ask herself – where is home? What is a family? And most importantly, who am I, really?

It’s a must-read book that guides you on recovering from childhood abuse. I like the emphasis on a history of childhood abuse is not a life sentence. That alone tells us that there is always hope – and better days.

One of the memorable exercises I find interesting is a memorial exercise when you say goodbye to fantasies that your childhood could somehow be different: I hereby lay to rest my fantasy of the good family. I hereby lay to rest my hopes and expectations about my parents…may these fantasies rest in peace.

This is not a very well-known title but it’s one that I found to be very insightful. The Narcissistic Family outlines patterns of behavior from parents that lead to difficulty in children developing healthy boundaries and a healthy sense of self-acceptance. One of the reasons I like this book is that, while applicable to more overt cases of emotional abuse, it also speaks to a wide range of behavior, including more hidden or covert instances of emotional abuse. If you’ve ever suspected that one or both of your parents has narcissistic traits – that they guilt trip you excessively, are manipulative, and generally expect you to meet their emotional needs without ever doing so in return – then you will likely get a lot out of this book.

I recommend this book because it helps the reader come to terms with their childhood emotional neglect/abuse. It breaks down trauma responses in a way that is easily digestible for someone who may not have any prior knowledge of psychology. This book contains a wealth of real life experiences that are relatable to someone who may struggle with acknowledging their childhood emotional abuse as traumatic. It works really well as a self-help book or in conjunction with therapy.

This book is a great self-help workbook that gives a series of prompts while the reader is learning about and identifying their emotional trauma. It helps the readers identify with the examples presented in the stories. It also gives advice on working through healing and how your brain will trick you into stopping the work because it is protecting you from the pain. The writing prompts allow you to work through your emotional trauma in a safe, private space.

This book was really eye-opening for me and helped me learn what kinds of boundaries I needed to set in my own life. Whether you’re dealing with minor tiffs with your mom that you want to work on, or if you need to go no-contact with your mom, this book will help.